Instant Frustration: The Instant Approval Credit Card Experiment – Part 2

American Express said they could give me an instant decision on my credit card application in 60 seconds, and I was putting this claim to the test. Now it was time to raise the stakes.

INSTANT APPROVAL TEST #2: BLUE FROM AMERICAN EXPRESS

I filled out the same approval form, with exactly the same information, but now I made Horace Greenwaffle a slightly more affluent drug dealer, earning $62,200 per year.

Credit Card Application - Instant Approval?

This time I read the fine print, which said I would be charged an APR of 15%, 17%, or a whopping 19%, depending on whether they trusted a drug dealer.

Instant Approval Credit Card APR

Not exactly a great rate, but still better than borrowing money from the Mafia.

When I hit “Submit,” this time the answer came in just eight seconds. But guess what? There was no decision!

Instant Decision Credit Card Application - Really?

My pulse began to race, thinking I had proven that American Express could not give me a “decision in 60 seconds” … but then I saw the option to find out immediately. (So why didn’t they just tell me in the first place?)

I clicked through and found the answer: DENIED AGAIN!

Instant Credit Card Application Denied

It’s not easy being Greenwaffle.

Apparently, there was some bad credit in Horace Greenwaffle’s past that kept them from approving him, even with his $62,200 annual salary. Here’s a respectable middle-class drug dealer, haunted by his past credit history and in need of a credit monitoring service and maybe even a bad credit credit card offer.

Well, what if he made ten times that much? Then I was sure it would be much harder for Amex to turn him down. And I was right.

Please continue to Part 3: American Not-So-Express!

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